孤獨是每個人的必修課。縱然人生是孤獨的旅行，我們也完全可以讓自己變得豐盛起來。那麼感到孤獨時應該如何自處呢？
Everybody feels lonely from time to time.
無時無刻，大家都會感到某種程度上的孤單。
When we have no one to sit next to at lunch, when we move to a new city, or when nobody has time for us at the weekend.
例如在人山人海的食堂裡獨自用餐，剛抵達一個完全陌生的地方，又或者是孤伶伶地度過漫長的週末。
But over the last few decades, this occasional feeling has become chronic for millions.
但在近十幾年來，這問題困擾著數以百萬，並以逐年上升的趨勢增加中。
In the UK,60% of 18 to 34-year-olds say they often feel lonely.
就英國調查統計，有60%（18歲至34歲的）成年人表示他們經常感到孤獨。
In the US,46% of the entire population feel lonely regularly.
在美國，佔46%的人口表示他們經常感到孤獨。
We are living in the most connected time in human history.
雖然我們正處於人類史上網絡涵蓋的全盛期。
And yet, an unprecedented number of us feel isolated.
可在其中仍有巨量的人們時時刻刻感到孤獨。
Being lonely and being alone are not the same thing.
感到孤獨與獨自一人是不同的事。
You can be filled with bliss by yourself and hate every second surrounded by friends.
你可以用幸福感填滿自己，或者在朋友圍繞者你的時候厭煩著每一秒。
Loneliness is a purely subjective, individual experience.
孤獨是一種純粹的主觀體驗。
If you feel lonely, you are lonely.
如果你感到孤獨，你就是孤獨著。
A common stereotype is that loneliness only happens to people who don't know how to talk to people, or how to behave around others.
一種常見的刻板印象是，孤獨只會發生在不知道怎麼跟別人溝通，或者不知道怎麼與人互動。
But population-based studies have shown that social skills make practically no difference for adults when it comes to social connections.
但是以人口數為基底的研究發現社交技能在成人的社交繫上並沒有太多的影響，每個人都會感到孤獨。
Loneliness can affect everybody: money, fame, power, beauty, social skills, a great personality;
孤獨會影響每個人：錢、名聲、能力、 外表、社交技能、好的品格。
Nothing can protect you against loneliness because it's part of your biology.
但沒有一項可以保護你對抗孤獨，因為這是你生物學的一部分。
Loneliness is a bodily function, like hunger.
孤獨是一種身體機能，就像飢餓。
Hunger makes you pay attention to your physical needs.
飢餓讓你知道你物理上的需求(食物)。
Loneliness makes you pay attention to your social needs.
孤獨則讓你知道你社交上的需求。
Your body cares about your social needs, because millions of years ago it was a great indicator of how likely you were to survive.
身體對於你的社交需求非常在乎，因為幾百萬年以來，這是一個關係到你怎麼生存下來的指標。
Natural selection rewarded our ancestors for collaboration, and for forming connections with each other.
在物競天擇中，我們的祖先互相合作，並且建立彼此的關係而存活下來。
Our brains grew and became more and more fine-tuned to recognize what others thought and felt, and to form and sustain social bonds.
我們的大腦成長，越來越能精細的體會到他人的想法跟感受，並且進一步的形成且維持社交聯繫。
Being social became part of our biology.
「進行社交行為」成為我們生物學的一部分。
You were born into groups of 50 to 150 people which you usually stayed with for the rest of your life.
你這一輩子中大概會在一個50人到150人的群體中度過一生。
Getting enough calories, staying safe and warm, or caring for offspring was practically impossible alone.
取得足夠的熱量、在溫暖又安全的地方待著、照料著後代，這些都不可能獨自完成。
Being together meant survival.
群聚意味著生存。
Being alone meant death.
獨自一人意味著死亡。
So it was crucial that you got along with others.
所以，與他人相處極其重要。
For your ancestors, the most dangerous threat to survival was not being eaten by a lion, but not getting the social vibe of your group and being excluded.
對於我們的祖先最危險的生命威脅並不是被其他生物捕食，而是不在社交群內，被排除在外。
To avoid that, your body came up with 'social pain'.
我們的身體為了阻止這一切而發展出了「社交痛苦」。
Pain of this kind is an evolutionary adaptation to rejection: a sort of early warning system to make sure you stop behavior that would isolate you.
這種痛苦是一種演化中為了適應的預警系統，以確保你停止做出孤立自己的行為。
Your ancestors who experienced rejection as more painful were more likely to change their behavior when they got rejected and thus stayed in the tribe, while those who did not got kicked out and most likely died.
那些體認被拒絕的經驗比他人更痛苦的祖先，更有可能在被拒絕時改變他們的行為，因此能留在部落裡，而那些不改變行為者則被踢出部落並很可能都已經死亡。
That's why rejections hurt.
這就是被排除在外會感覺難受。
And even more so, why loneliness is so painful.
甚至、孤獨是會令人感到痛苦的。
These mechanisms for keeping us connected worked great for most of our history,
這些機制讓人們在歷史上互相連結著彼此，並且良好的合作著。
until humans began building a new world for themselves.
直到人們為自己建造了新的世界。
The loneliness epidemic we see today really only started in the late Renaissance.
我們現在看到的「孤獨流行病」其實起於文藝復興晚期。
Western culture began to focus on the individual.
西方文化開始重視各人個體。
Intellectuals moved away from the collectivism of the Middle Ages, while the young Protestant theology stressed individual responsibility.
於年輕的基督新教中開始強調個人的責任，知識分子開始從中世紀的集體主義中分離出來。
This trend accelerated during the Industrial Revolution.
而這趨勢在工業革命中越演越烈。
People left their villages and fields to enter factories.
人們離開了他們的村莊和田地，開始進入工廠。
Communities that had existed for hundreds of years began to dissolve, while cities grew.
存在幾百年以來的社區開始瓦解，而城市開始興起。
As our world rapidly became modern, this trend sped up more and more.
在我們的世界越快速的現代化過程中，這種趨勢也越來越快。
Today, we move vast distances for new jobs, love and education, and leave our social net behind.
現今，我們為了工作、愛情或教育移動了很長的距離，並將我們的人際網絡拋在腦後。
We meet fewer people in person, and we meet them less often than in the past.
我們越來越少面對面的遇見人們，甚至比以前更少。
In the US, the mean number of close friends dropped from 3 in 1985 to 2 in 2011.
在美國，平均親密的朋友從1958年的3人下降至2011年的2人。
Most people stumble into chronic loneliness by accident.
大部分的人漸漸地產生了慢性的孤獨感。
You reach adulthood and become busy with work, university, romance, kids and Netflix.
隨著年齡成長，忙於作業、學業、愛情、小孩以及Netflix影集。
There's just not enough time.
時間根本不夠用。
The most convenient and easy thing to sacrifice is time with friends.
最便利也最容易被犧牲掉的是與朋友相處的時間。
Until you wake up one day and realize that you feel isolated;that you yearn for close relationships.
直到有一天起醒來，並且發現你感到被孤立；你開始渴望更緊密的關係。
But it's hard to find close connections as adults and so, loneliness can become chronic.
但成年人之間很難找到緊密關係，所以漸漸地發生慢性「孤獨症」。
While humans feel pretty great about things like iPhones and spaceships, our bodies and minds are fundamentally the same they were 50,000 years ago.
雖然人們對iPhones或宇宙飛船的事情相當感興趣，但我們的身體與心智基本上跟5萬年以前沒什麼不同。
We are still biologically fine-tuned to being with each other.
我們在生物學上仍然是那個，為了相處而精細調整的自我。
Large scale studies have shown that the stress that comes from chronic loneliness is among the most unhealthy things we can experience as humans.
大量的研究顯示出慢性的孤獨感所帶來的壓力是人類能體會到最不健康的事情之一了。
It makes you age quicker, it makes cancer deadlier, Alzheimer's advance faster, your immune systems weaker.
它使人快速老化、癌症更加致命、阿茲海默症惡化更快、免疫系統也會變弱。
Loneliness is twice as deadly as obesity and as deadly as smoking a pack of cigarettes a day.
孤獨症的致死率是肥胖的兩倍，與癮君子每天抽一包菸一樣致死率。
The most dangerous thing about it is that once it becomes chronic, it can become self-sustaining.
而最危險的事情當孤獨症慢性的發生，它將會在腦中自我維持著這樣的感覺。
Physical and social pain use common mechanisms in your brain.
物理上的疼痛與社交痛苦都使用大腦常見的機制。
Both feel like a threat, and so,
兩者都會讓大腦感受到威脅，所以，
social pain leads to immediate and defensive behaviour when it's inflicted on you.
當社交痛苦發生的時候，身體會立刻產生防禦反應。
When loneliness becomes chronic, your brain goes into self-preservation mode.
當孤獨症開始慢性發生的時候，你的大腦將會進入自我防禦的狀態。
It starts to see danger and hostility everywhere.
它會使你開始時常在各種地方感覺到危險或敵意。
But that's not all.
但還不只這些。
Some studies found that when you're lonely, your brain is much more receptive and alert to social signals, while at the same time, it gets worse at interpreting them correctly.
有些研究發現當你感受到孤獨，你的大腦將更容易警覺地接收到來自社交的信息，在這個時候，錯誤的解讀將會使事情更糟。
You pay more attention to others but you understand them less.
你花費了更多的關注在他人身上，但瞭解的更少。
The part of your brain that recognises faces gets out of tune and becomes more likely to categorize neutral faces as hostile, which makes it distrustful of others.
大腦中識別臉孔的機能將會失調，開始會將中性的他人面容識別為具敵對性，這讓其他人感到苦難重重。
Loneliness makes you assume the worst about others' intentions towards you.
孤獨症會讓你對任何接近的行為都做最壞的打算。
Because of this perceived hostile world, you can become up more self-centered to protect yourself, which can make you appear more cold, unfriendly and socially awkward than you really are.
由於開始認定這個世界充滿敵意，你會變得更加以自我為中心來保護自己，這會讓你變得比原本的個性更加冷漠、不友善且容易社交尷尬。
If loneliness has become a strong presence in your life, the first thing you can do is to try to recognise the vicious cycle you may be trapped in.
如果孤獨症已經在你生命中嚴重的存在，第一件你能做的事，就是要試著認識到你會落入怎樣的「惡性循環」中。
It usually goes something like this: An initial feeling of isolation leads to feelings of tension and sadness, which makes you focus your attention selectively on negative interactions with others.
通常是像這樣：最早發生孤立感的時候通常會引發緊張與悲傷的感覺。
This makes your thoughts about yourself and others more negative, which then changes your behavior.
這會讓你太專注在與他人的負面互動上，這會讓你對自己與他人的想法更加消極，接著你就會開始改變你的行為。
You begin to avoid social interaction, which leads to more feelings of isolation.
你會開始避免社交互動，這將會導致感受到更多的孤立感。
This cycle becomes more severe and harder to escape each time.
這樣的循環會越來越嚴重，而且更加困難逃離這樣的狀況。
Loneliness makes you sit far away from others in class, not answer the phone when friends call, decline invitations until the invitations stop.
孤獨症讓你在教室中遠離其他人，朋友來電時不接聽、拒絕各種邀請直到不再有人願意邀請你。
Each and every one of us has a story about ourselves, and if your story becomes that people exclude you, others pick up on that, and so the outside world can become the way you feel about it.
我們每個人都有屬於自己的故事，如果你的故事是人們開始排斥你，其他人也認同這點的話，那麼你也會這樣的體會著外面的世界。
This is often a slow creeping process that takes years, and can end in depression and a mental state that prevents connections, even if you yearn for them.
這通常是一個需要數年的緩慢過程，並且最終迎來抑鬱的情緒，即使渴望與他人聯繫，你的精神狀況也會阻止你這麼做。
The first thing you can do to escape it is to accept that loneliness is a totally normal feeling and nothing to be ashamed of.
你能做到的第一件事就是：接受到「孤獨感」是一種很正常的情緒，並不需要為此感到羞愧。
Literally, everybody feels lonely at some point in their life, it's a universal human experience.
事實上每個人都在某個時間點感受過孤獨，這個世界的人們普遍經歷過的。
You can't eliminate or ignore a feeling until it goes away magically, but you can accept that you feel it and get rid of its cause.
在這樣的感覺魔術般消失前，你不能消除或無視它，但你可以接受它，並且擺脫發生的原因。
You can self-examine what you focus your attention on,
你可以對關注的事情做自我審視，
and check if you are selectively concentrating on negative things.
檢查是不是有選擇性專注在負面的事物上。
Was this interaction with a colleague really negative, or was it really neutral or even positive?
與同事間的相處真的是負面的嗎？還是其實是中立的或者是正面的呢？
What was the actual content of an interaction?
你們互動的實際內容是什麼？
What did the other person say?
對方有說了些什麼嗎？
And did they say something bad, or did you add extra meaning to their words?
他們是不是真的說了些什麼糟糕的話，或者你是不是過度解讀對方的意思？
Maybe another person was not really reacting negatively, but just short on time.
也許對方並沒有真正的做出負面反應，而只是純粹時間緊迫。
Then, there are your thoughts about the world.
接著，關於你對這個世界的想法。
Are you assuming the worst about others' intentions?
你是否常常假設別人對你的意圖都是糟糕的？
Do you enter a social situation and have already decided how it will go?
你真的有進入一個社交互動中，並且預先立場的決定事情如何走向？
Do you assume others don't want you around?
你是否認為其他人都不要你嗎？
Are you trying to avoid being hurt and not risking opening up?
你是否試著避免自己受傷而不想冒險開放自己呢？
And, if so, can you try to give others the benefit of the doubt?
那麼，如果可以的話 你是否能試著不再懷疑他人？
Can you just assume that they're not against you?
你是否能假設他們不是一昧的想要反對你嗎？
Can you risk being open and vulnerable again?
你是否能再次冒險開放自己的內心呢？
And lastly, your behaviour.
最後，關於你的行為。
Are you avoiding opportunities to be around others?
你是否逃避與他人在一起的機會嗎？
Are you looking for excuses to decline invitations?
在尋找拒絕邀請的藉口嗎？
Or are you pushing others away preemptively to protect yourself?
你是否先發制人的為了保護自己而將他人推開？
Are you acting as if you're getting attacked?
你的行為表現象是受到攻擊了嗎？
Are you really looking for new connections, or have you become complacent with your situation?
你有真的在尋找新的關係嗎？或者你讓對自己的情況感到自滿？
Of course, every person and situation is unique and different,
當然，每個人的情況都是獨一無二的，
and just introspection alone might not be enough.
單單只是自我反省也許還不夠。
If you feel unable to solve your situation by yourself, please try to reach out and get professional help.
如果你覺得自己無法解決問題，請嘗試聯繫並獲得專業幫助。
It's not a sign of weakness, but of courage.
這不是軟弱，而是勇氣的表現。
However we look at loneliness, as a purely individual problem that needs solving to create more personal happiness, or as a public health crisis, it is something that deserves more attention.
無論我們將孤獨症看作純粹的個人問題，解決它可以創造更多個人的幸福感，或者視為公眾健康危機。
Humans have built a world that's nothing short of amazing,
這都是值得更多關注的事情，人類建立了一個令人驚歎的世界，
and yet, none of the shiny things we've made is able to satisfy or substitute our fundamental biological need for connection.
然而我們創造出閃亮的東西中，沒有一個能夠滿足或替代 我們最基本連繫著彼此的需求。
Most animals get what they need from their physical surroundings.
大多數動物能從現實環境中獲得所需。
We get what we need from each other, and we need to build our artificial human world based on that.
我們能在彼此間互取所需，並且在這個基礎上建立起人類的世界。
Let's try something together: let's reach out to someone today, regardless if you feel a little bit lonely, or if you want to make someone else's day better.
讓我們一起來試試看：讓我們今天與某個人接觸，不管你是感到有點孤獨，或者你想讓某個人的一天有所不同。
Maybe write a friend you haven't spoken to in a while.
也許寫個信給很久沒說過話的朋友。
Call a family member who's become estranged.
打電話給有些疏遠的親戚。
Invite a work buddy for a coffee, Or just go to something you're usually too afraid to go to or too lazy to go to, like a D&D;event or a sports club.
邀請工作夥伴來杯咖啡，或者出發前往一些你平常不敢、或懶得去的活動，像是龍與地下城聚會、或者運動俱樂部。
Everybody's different, so you know what's a good fit for you.
每個人都不同，所以你知道什麼對你才是最好的。
Maybe nothing will come of it, and that's okay.
也許什麼都不會發生，沒關係的。
Don't do this with any expectations.
不用抱持著這樣的期待而做。
The goal is just to open up a bit;to exercise your connection muscles, so they can grow stronger over time, or to help others exercise them.
我們的目標只是希望敞開一點自我，鍛鍊你的「聯繫彼此肌肉群」，讓它們隨著時間成長，或者幫助其他人鍛鍊社交能力。
We want to recommend two of the books we read while researching this video.
我們想要推薦在製作這個影片時所研究的兩本書。
'Emotional First Aid' by Guy Winch, a book that addresses, among other topics, how to deal with loneliness in a way that we found helpful and actionable and 'Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection' by John Cacioppo and William Patrick.
《Emotional First Aid》，作者 Guy Winch，其中關於如何應對孤獨感，我們找到了有用且值得去做的主題，以及《Loneliness： Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection》，作者 John Cacioppo 和 William Patrick。
It's an entertaining and scientific exploration as to why we experience loneliness on a biological level, how it spread in society and what science has to say about how to escape it.
裡頭有著有趣且科學的解釋有關：為什麼感受到孤獨是生物學的一部分，孤獨感如何在社會中傳播， 且如何用科學的方式遠離它。
Links for both books are in the video description.
在影片敘述中有這兩本書的相關鏈接。
© Kurzgesagt – In a Nutshell
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