你們看 是喬伊的照片
Ooh! Look! Look! Look! Look, there's Joey's picture!
真是令人興奮
This is so exciting!
要找出沒看過他演出的人真是一撈一大把
You can always spot someone who's never seen one of his plays before.
友情提示 待會別害怕
Notice, no fear,
別以為世界末日
no sense of impending doom...
標題上的驚歎號讓我有點害怕
The exclamation point in the title scares me.
不是平靜的佛洛依德 而是佛洛依德
Y'know, it's not just Freud, it's Freud!
噓噓 見證奇蹟的一刻就要開始了
Oh, shhh, shh. Magic is about to happen.
伊娃 你今天的表現不錯
Well, Eva, ve've done some excellent vork here,
我得說 你的問題相當清楚
and I vould have to say, your pwoblem is qviiite clear.
*你只是想要一個風鈴*
*All you want is a tinkle*
*你討厭流行的東西*
*What you envy's a schwang*
*聽它發出清脆的聲音*
*A thing through which you can tinkle*
*撥弄著它 或是掛在那邊*
*To play with or simply let hang.*
天哪 我感覺被傷害了
God. I feel violated.
別的觀眾會不會覺得寧願被剝皮拆骨
Did anybody else feel they just wanted to
也不想看這場演出
peel the skin off their body, to have something else to do?
羅斯 十點鐘
Ross, ten o'clock.
是嗎 現在不是兩點鐘麼
Is it? Feels like two.
不 十點方向
No, ten o'clock.-
什麼
What?
一位美女在八 九 十點鐘方向
There's a beautiful woman at eight, nine, ten o'clock!
不錯嘛
Oh. Hel-lo!
她可真漂亮
She's amazing!
她讓我所有的夢中情人
She makes the women that I dream about
瞬間化為矮胖光頭男
look like short, fat, bald men!
過去啊 她旁邊沒人
Well, go over to her! She's not with anyone.
對 我該用什麼開場白
Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be?
打擾了 之類的
'Excuse me. Blarrglarrghh.'
拜託 不就是個女人嗎 你沒問題的
Oh, come on. She's a person, you can do it!
拜託 我和她真的相差很多好嗎
Oh please, could she be more out of my league?
羅斯 幫我壯壯膽
Ross, back me up here.
他這副德行百萬年內都別想把到這種美女
He could never get a woman like that in a million years.
謝了 老兄
Thank you, buddy.
但這種絕世美女身邊總是
Oh, oh, but y'know, you always see these really beautiful women
跟著絕世蹩腳貨
with these really nothing guys,
你也可以成為其中之一
you could be one of those guys.
沒錯你能辦到
You could do that!
-真的嗎 -沒錯
- You think? - Yeah!
上帝啊 沒想到我竟有這種念頭
Oh God, I can't believe I'm even considering this...
我非常非常瞭解自己的層次
I'm very very aware of my tongue...
快去 加油
Come on! Come on!
我上了
Here goes.
有事嗎
...Yes?
你好 好吧 我想說 錢德勒
Hi.... um... okay, next word... would be...Chandler!
我叫錢德勒
Chandler is my name, and, uh... hi.
-我知道 你剛說過 -對 我說過
- Yes, you said that. - Yes, yes I did,
但我沒說的是 我將要說的是
but what I didn't say was what I was about to say,
我本想說的是
what I wanted to say was, uh...
你願意與我約會嗎 謝謝 晚安
would you like to go out with me sometime, thankyou, goodnight.
錢德勒
Chandler?
來了
Hey!
-想不到你會跳舞 -你演戲了 -還有大鬍子
- I didn't know you could dance! - You're in a play! - You had a beard!
感覺如何
What do you think?
-想不到你會跳舞 -你演戲了 -還有大鬍子
- I didn't know you could dance! - You're in a play! - You had a beard!
拜託沒那麼糟吧
C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad.
我是主角
I was the lead.
總比那次我在輪唱中出現
It was better than that thing I did with the trolls,
至少你們可以看見我的頭
at least you got to see my head.
我們有看見 看到你的頭了
Saw your head. Saw your head.
她答應了 她答應了
She said yes!! She said yes!!
好爛的戲 嘔
Awful play, man. Whoah.
她叫奧蘿拉 意大利人
Her name's Aurora, and she's Italian,
她把我的名字念成"錢德勒爾"
and she pronounces my name 'Chand-lrr'.'Chand-lrr'.
我喜歡她這樣稱呼我
I think I like it better that way.
領座員要我把它交給你
Oh, listen, the usher gave me this to give to you.
埃斯特爾·萊納德經紀公司
The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency.
經紀公司送我名片 或許他們想和我簽約
Wow, an agency left me its card! Maybe they wanna sign me!
因為這場戲嗎
Based on this play?
因為這場戲啊
Based on this play!
-嗨 各位 -嗨 錢德勒
- Hey, kids! - Hey, Chandler.
不 這條線是熱情 這一條只是線而已
No, because this line is passion, and this is just a line.
我無法相信我坐在這兒七秒鐘
Well, I can't believe I've been here almost seven seconds
竟沒人問我的約會如何
and you haven't asked me how my date went.
對哦 你的約會如何 錢德勒爾
Oh, right, right. How was your date, 'Chand-lrr'?
真是令人難以置信
It was unbelievable.
我沒見過像她那樣的人
I-I've never met anyone like her.
她的生活真是太豐富多彩了
She's had the most amazing life!
她穿過以色列陣地
She was in the Israeli army...
幸好子彈沒打中引擎
...Luckily none of the bullets hit the engine block.
我們才能越過邊界 真是有驚無險
So, we made it to the border, but just barely, and I ...
我整晚都在談我自己 抱歉
I've been talking about myself all night long, I'm sorry.
你呢 有什麼故事說來聽聽嘛
What about you? Tell me one of your stories.
有一回我搭地鐵
Alright. Once I got on the subway, right,
當時是晚上 我一路坐到布魯克林區
and it was at night, and I rode it all the way to Brooklyn...
然後活著回來
just for the hell of it.
我們一直談到兩點
We talked till like two.
那真是個美好的夜晚
It was this perfect evening...
可以這麼說
more or less.
突然我們發現自己身在葉門
...All of a sudden we realised we were in Yammon.
我們 我們是誰
Oh, I'm sorry, so 'we'is?
我和瑞克
'We'would be me and Rick.
瑞克是誰
Who's Rick?
我丈夫
My husband.
這麼說你們已經離婚
Oh, so you're divorced?
沒有
No.
對不起 這麼說你是寡婦 希望如此
Oh, I'm sorry, then you're widowed? Hopefully?
不 我們還是夫妻
No, I'm still married.
告訴我 你覺得
So tell me, how do- how do you think
你丈夫會對你現在和我坐在一起有何感想
your husband would feel about you sitting here with me?
而且你的腳搭到我大腿上
Sliding your foot so far up my pant leg
都可以數清我口袋裡的零錢了
you can count the change in my pocket?
未完
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