大家好，我是江博教育，羅攀攀老師，今天我給大家帶來託福乾貨文章，無套路（文末有免費資料領取）。
有很多學生都問過我，“攀攀老師，我綜合已經拿到good了，為什麼總分還是一直上不去，託福總卡在22，23？
‘’我已經寫到500字了，為什麼獨立寫作還拿不到good？”等等諸如此類到問題。鑑於很大一波學生都一直卡在20-23不上不下，今天老師來跟大家一起分享一下託福獨立寫作的快速通關秘籍。
下面老師會拿一個原始分為22，6課時後突破到28分的聰明寶寶的作文來和大家講講獨立寫作的突破點。
我們重點來看一下主要拿分的理由段的寫法：
Firstly, knowing the events happening around the world can make a young people to build correct value system. Viewing the news that reports the hottest international events can make a young people get more information about the world. In addition, they sometimes can see people's comments that represent the opinion of the mainstream society. They get to distinct right and wrong in an early age. My cousin Cecilia can be a perfect example to prove my opinion. the Model United Nations club because it provides teenagers a place to discuss the recent events happened worldwide. She changed a lot in the very first semester. With the discussion of refugees problem in a MUN conference, she started to know the importance value of peace deeply. Children in her age are actually more aggressive and cannot see the value of living in a peace area. But by knowing the international events, Cecilia directly sees how miserable the refugees are and how valuable peace is. This shows that caring the events happening around the world, a young student and build their sense of right and wrong.
Secondly, knowing the events happening around the world can make people learn from the mistakes people made and avoid doing so. Some news report the failure that we can seldom see in daily life, and that provides a precious opportunity for people to learn from the mistake. Without careing about the events happened, people can never have the chance to realize this in their limited social circle. For instance, once I saw a news which reported a phone company that I never interested in made phones that have potential to explode. The factory wanted to increase their productivity and ignore the quality check. When I heard about this sensational news, I realized that the principle of finishing a work should be quality over quantity. Since then, I always double check my work before I submit to my teacher. Without knowing this news, I would never be able to get into the habit of checking things.
粗略一看，好像寫的也不錯，兩個理由段字數350+，但是一細看，就會發現很多問題了：
首先看我劃線的句子，有8個句式結構一樣的句子，尤其顯眼的是兩個主體段的理由句，幾乎一摸一樣，用詞也比較單一比，如see（斜體）出現了5次，而句式結構多樣化是拿good的必要條件，那麼顯然就是一個fair的得分了。
另外我們再看一下論證部分，理由段一的例子部分：有一個提供給學生討論世界時事的club，所以她變了很多。缺乏了前後的對比邏輯。需要把整個事件過程講明白，邏輯通順讓人能讀懂是最基本的要求。
上述提到的問題點，都是我們現在22分左右常忽視的問題，大家平時在寫作中也要注意規避。
下面我們再來看看提高後的理由段：
Initially, specialized skill can quickly make a person become an authority because few people have strong knowledge background in that specific field. With a unique ability, people working in that special field are easier to become popular comparing with those hot fields. Their specialized skill lead them to the path of becoming an authority because few people are familiar with this field and fewer will challenge their assumptions. A scholar, my neighbor for example, who is very good at identifying the time of antiques, became famous because of a TV show wherein authorities identify whether the antique is fake or real. He was very talented at his field, which many people were not familiar with. Five years ago When the show producer was considering about inviting an advisor, he became the most suitable choice specifically for this show. With the great popularity gained by the show, he became well-known and considered to be the authority of his field. It is his specialized ability which lead him to the great success.
Secondly, favorable environment of success having very few competitors can be created by a specialized skill. The special ability will lead a person to a situation which has few competitors and therefore make the person easier to success by this monopoly market, especially for a specific business. My grandfather is a very precise example to assist me to illustrate my point with his path to success…
我們重點來看一下，兩個主體段的理由句，解釋說理句子，以及提出例子句，會發現，兩個主體段句式結構完全不一樣，尤其是主體段一的的例子列舉，複雜化了句式結構，和我們閱讀分析的長難句不相上下了。這些都是幫助快速拿高分的重要突破點，那麼剩餘部分的例子事件，按時間先後邏輯常規講完整個過程，句間邏輯不混亂就可以了。
最後還要跟大家解答一下困擾很多人的一個問題：舉例子到底是舉個例，泛例，調查數據，還是名人例子？哪個得分會更高？從上文我們會發現，即使兩個理由段都舉了個例，依然可以拿到28分，所以個例也沒大家想的那麼low哈。
托福考試是一個語言類考試，我們更多的是去看語言，邏輯，而不是例子高大上，相信大家已經有答案啦，也歡迎大家積極來和我討論。
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