中央咖啡館
There's nothing to tell! 這沒什麼好說的
He's just some guy I work with!他不過是我的同事
C'mon, you're going out with the guy!少來了 你們都在約會了
There's gotta be something wrong with him!這個男人一定有什麼問題
So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?他是駝背嗎 戴著假髮的駝背
Wait, does he eat chalk?等等 他吃粉筆嗎
Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl.我只是不想你重蹈我和卡爾的覆轍
Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.拜託各位 放鬆點 這甚至不算是約會，只不過是兩個人出去吃個飯而且不會上床
Sounds like a date to me.聽起來像是和我約會
Alright, so I'm back in high school,於是我回到了高中學校
I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria and I realize I am totally naked.我站在食堂中間，然後發現自己全身赤裸
Oh, yeah. Had that dream.噢 做過那種夢
Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone there.然後我低下頭 看見那裡有一部手機
Instead of...? - That's right.那話兒變成了 -沒錯
- Never had that dream. - No.-這種夢倒從未做過 -沒有
All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring.突然 那電話響起來了
And it turns out it's my mother,結果是我媽打來的
which is very-very weird because she never calls me!這非常非常奇怪，因為她從來不打電話給我
Hi.嗨
This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.這傢伙一張嘴打招呼 我就想自殺
Are you okay, sweetie?你還好吧 親愛的
I just feel like someone reached down my throat grabbed my small intestine,我感覺有人把手伸入我的喉嚨抓住我的小腸
pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...從我嘴裡扯出來然後纏在我脖子上
……
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